My Father’s Day

So, this year is rough cause I just had to leave my daddy (who just lost HIS daddy in May) 3 days ago to get Ri back to Tx in time to see her daddy this weekend. So, I’m already extra emotional today lol… but I really wanna take a min to love on my awesome daddy!

You see, I have a dad who hasn’t been my dad because he made a mistake at 16 and got my mom knocked up and got “stuck” being a dad…I have a daddy who came into our lives and stayed there when no one else would because he CHOSE to be my dad.

The man who gave DNA to me? He left my life with zero attempt to be in it when I was still in diapers. I know where he lives now and have contacted him multiple tines…we even spoke over the phone for a few years and started building a relationship if sorts in 2008, but had never met…despite 2 attempts in the past year on my part…granted we had some words in 2011 when things got rough in both our lives at the same time (I was suffering from loss of custody of my child and he was morning the death of his 16 year old dog) and then he bailed again…never to contact me again, despite many attempts to reconcile on my end, and now he wants nothing to do with me or my daughter…and I’ve reached out many many times with no luck.

Moving on….to my sister’s DNA doner? (My 1st “step dad”) He bailed too….sisters were still in diapers as well…fast forward again about 3 years or so….I was 10 1/5 years old when Tony SantaMaria came into the picture and I HATED him with all I had….”Here we go again” I thought….”Wonder how long this one will stay!?”

Well…..I was so unbelievably wrong!!!!! Here we are nearly 25 years later….standing strong!

My daddy loves me and mt daughter more than his next breath! He would be around us all day everyday for the rest of eternity if he had the chance! He’s gone above and beyond to move mountains for us girls even when we were avidly working against him! There’s not a thing in  this realm or another that any of us could do to make him stop loving us! And believe me, we’ve tried…

Has it ever been a perfect love? Not even close!  Will it ever be? Nope! But that’s ok! See, that’s what makes it so special. Perfect love is easy. Takes no effort and just works….ah, but imperfect love is hard. It takes work. Lots of it. It takes a fight. A drive. A desire. And most of all a CHOICE!! My daddy is my daddy because he has CHOSEN to love us over the years! Not because he had an obligation. Not because his name was on our birth certificates and the gov made him. Not cause he had guilt, shame, or any other reason that a biological parent has. But simply because he just truly, from his soul, loves us! THAT, to me, is a true father! Anyone can help MAKE a child…. But actually stepping up and being a PARENT? THAT is what makes you a father or daddy!

Thank you daddy! For loving us even when we were busy being not very loving to you! Happy Father’s Day! I love you daddy!

“It is not flesh and blood, but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.”

-Johann Friedrich von Schiller

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