Touched and Protected


How often do you tell those around you that you love them? I mean like for real love them? Like wrapping your arms around them and telling them your life wouldn’t be the same without them?

When someone comes into your heart do you text/call/visit them? Or do you just go on about your day?

Life us so short. People are out here struggling to find love and don’t even know they already have it!

The younger generations are starving for authenticity and a deep desire to feel wanted and needed. And it’s because we’ve allowed the enemy to steal from them!

It takes seconds to say something nice to someone in passing and that something can literally change a life!

I am reminded of a time I was in my preteen years and I had been fighting a spirit of suicide for weeks. I’d cut myself till there was nothing left to cut and (in mid summer) had wrapped it up and hid it because “I was just a throw away and if they found out they’d send me away again and it wouldn’t have made a difference anyway.” So I went to school and at lunch a girl I never met said in passing “are you ok? You look upset.” No one notices me so I didn’t think she was talking to me. She then stopped and TOUCHED ME! She put her hand on me and said “it’s ok to cry…just don’t do it here…those girls over there can be so mean…wanna go to the PE field and sit?” See, that table of girls? They’d been bullying for 2 years. They’d followed me most of the way home daily mocking me and throwing stuff at me. The sad pitiful “poor girl” for months. That girl who touched me didn’t know how I’d been begging “If there’s a God….send ANYONE to care about me” That girl who touched me saved my life that day.

Unfortunately, the trauma in my life didn’t end there so that suicidal spirit stuck around for a few years till I delt with it for good in my early 30s…but that wasn’t the last time God sent an “angel” into my life to help me fight that spirit either! Every time it’s been on me God has sent a PERSON to SPEAK into me in some way or another. And TOUCH me gently to remind me “I Am here.”

The other day I gave my salvation testimony at school and it’s quite similar to the story above….funny how you start seeing the cycles in your life as you get older….but the biggest similarity in it is the PERSON He sent to SPEAK into me and TOUCH me!

Please hear me when I say a hug and an “I love you” can literally save the life of someone who may “seem ok” to you.

If you ask anyone who knows me WELL I am too strong for my own good sometimes. I am known for pushing harder than I should for longer than I should and don’t give myself grace or the permission to rest because I wasn’t granted that in my younger years. I didn’t cultivate the core values of basic coping skills because chaos surrounded me everywhere I went. So I shut down often and don’t let people see “me” when I am “weak.”

This week I’ve been down HARD with vertigo and I’ve pushed through it harder than I’ve ever pushed through in YEARS because I am certain it’s demonic and I am DONE allowing it to attack me. Today I was given strict orders to rest…and it dawned on me….I don’t submit to MYSELF 🥴 Apostle Dayna says it best “Submission is only permission to protect” and it hit me so hard this week as we enter Passover….I don’t even give MYSELF permission to protect myself….how can I give others that permission when I don’t even know what ot looks like to BE protected!? Then I look back to the girl who TOUCHED me….to the 32 year old woman that was hrs from death that was TOUCHED (hugged) by a random person at a church function the night she’d planned a whole suicide out. I didn’t learn how to let others protect me because in my youth no one’s ever protected me from anything…but as I scan my life and take for real inventory this week I see I have ALWAYS been protected by my Papa and now that I have allowed Him to show me all this, HE will now begin to show me how to TRULY allow OTHERS to protect me as well….plot twist…there’s already a whole tribe of folks protecting me behind the scenes even when I don’t see it….going into this Passover season I am so grateful for this revelation and the ability to GET TO FINALLY learn how to truly submit.

I say all this to say PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE if you’re the one who struggling LET SOMEONE TOUCH YOU!!! Don’t recoil! I KNOW it’s scary but it’s less scary than living in bandage and unprotected. And if you’re the one who needs to reach out to someone DONOT HESITATE!!! Tell someone what they mean!! HUG THEM!!! TOUCH THEM!! LAY YOUR HAND ON THERE SHOULDER!!! Do SOMETHING today because you may have time…but they may not.

Also, if you think you have NO ONE PLEASE PM ME!!!! You have someone! I am here and I promise it’s not by accident or happenstance! I am here for a reason and YOU may be part of that reason! You’re not alone and you are loved!!!

PS it’s not weakness either because this is honestly one of the hardest things I’ve ever learned or dealt with!!!

All my love,

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